requiem for a living nightmare

everyone seems set on trying to cheer me up.

i don't want to be cheered up.

allow me to grieve. 

allow my melancholy state to consume me. let me entangle myself in the ever-hopeless saturninity plaguing my heart and soul. allow me to sink and drown. allow me to mourn.

leave me with myself and my memories and my thoughts and my muse and let me work things out without your interference. let me have a few days on my own where i can sort through everything i'm feeling and everything i'm trying to bury away so i can come to terms with this.

i don't want to talk. i don't want to be comforted. 

allow me to deal with this as best i can, the only way i really know how - to scream and cry and bleed all this out in the inked words that are consuming and haunting me.

if i don't answer your messages and phone calls, it's really nothing personal. don't wind yourself up over it or think i'm ignoring you. if i don't get back to you right away, don't feel as if i don't need you. i do. but i also need some time on my own to sort through all of these overwhelming emotions that are eating at my insides. 

yours-
 katie